Style Is a Language. What’s Yours Saying?
We’re exploring fashion as a powerful form of self-expression and identity. This is your guide to dressing with authenticity, intention, and confidence.
Your Outfit Speaks Before You Do
Imagine walking into a room without saying a word–yet telling everyone exactly who you are.
That’s the power of fashion. It’s an instant conversation starter, a lasting first impression, and a reflection of how you feel and how you want to be seen.
Remember when Elle Woods arrived at Harvard in Legally Blonde? Everyone around her was dressed in dull colors and then she popped out in hot pink. Even as people stared, whispered, and snickered, Elle stood confidently in her identity. Without saying a word, she made a statement: she’s girly, she’s bold, and she’s that btch.
Getting dressed isn’t just about wearing clothes. It’s about communication.
Ask yourself:
If my wardrobe could talk, what would it say about me?
Style is your personality personified. Once you learn to fluently express your truest self, you don’t just get dressed–you self express.
So, let’s decode the language of fashion together.
And who knows? You just might (re)discover your authentic dialect in the process.
How Style Evolves With You
Just like language, no two people speak style the same.
Some of us are loud through vibrant colors and bold prints. Others more reserved through minimalism and monochrome tones. The point is: you have a fashion idiolect, and it’s deeply personal to you.
Learning it is a lifelong journey.
Because discovering your fashion voice is really about discovering yourself, over and over again.
Style evolves through eras and unfolds in chapters alongside you.
It’s identity in motion. From grade school to post-grad, early career and growing through womanhood, each version of you dressed a little differently. Not just because your closet changed, but because you did.
Think about the way you dressed at 12, then 16, 22 and beyond.
Wasn’t your style saying something a little different each time?
Chapter One:
Chronicles of a School Girl
It wasn’t until middle school that I was finally allowed to dress outside of a uniform, and I found most of my inspo through Lookbook and Polyvore (iykyk). I was obsessed with tribal and abstract prints, chunky statement necklaces, and an off-the-shoulder top, honey.
The early 2010s were truly a time.
Chapter Two:
The Birth of a Hot Girl
High school is when I started coming into myself.
Let me tell you, when a young woman realizes she’s beautiful, it’s like discovering a superpower.
By 17? Oh baby, you couldn’t tell me nothin’.
My outfits certainly got me into my fair share of trouble. They honestly should’ve renamed the principal’s office after me. Considering how often I was dress coded, I damn near lived there.
Chapter Three:
The 20-Somethings
In my early 20s, I entered what I consider my “baddie” era.
Very much a Barbie girl, living in my own world.
Oversized sunglasses? Check.
Thigh-length braids? Check.
Mini dress? Mini skirt? Absolutely.
Chapter Four:
The Grown Woman Era
By 25, I realized that dressing sexy didn’t always mean showing skin.
Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with a little cleavage or a high slit. I still enjoy channeling Tyra Bank’s iconic quote, “Hoe, but make it fashion” every now and then.
But I’ve also learned the power of subtlety. Of knowing I don’t have to reveal much to make a statement.
It’s a beautiful thing to watch your style transform over the years while staying true to your essence.
Me?
I’m bold like the wild prints I love.
Vibrant like the colors I wear.
Sexy like my favorite bustiers.
Elegant like a pair of kitten heels.
It’s fascinating how your wardrobe mirrors your growth and mindset. Honestly, your style eras say more about you than any throwback playlist or yearbook photo ever could.
You didn’t just grow up.
You evolved.
And your wardrobe came with you.
So, I’m curious–what are your style eras like?
Were you bold and daring? Preppy and polished? Subtle and minimalistic? Or a little bit of everything, and then some?
However you showed up back then, it was a reflection of who you were.
But now that you’ve arrived to your current chapter, who are you now?
And is your wardrobe speaking the same language?
Style on Mute
Somewhere along the way, a lot of us lose the plot.
Between trends, life’s curveballs, and the pressure to “fit in,” we often stop dressing for ourselves.
We start dressing for likes. For approval. For the algorithm.
When that happens, your wardrobe is no longer yours. It’s a mix of everyone else’s influence.
But here’s the thing:
Real style doesn’t echo. It expresses.
It doesn’t follow–it leads.
We live in a world that profits from lack of identity. Trends are constantly shifting. Social media tries to dictate what’s “hot” and what’s “not.” Suddenly, everyone’s wearing the exact same outfit for birthdays, holidays, and celebrations (Yikes!).
In a world where brands chase trends for profit, algorithms shape what we see, and there’s constant pressure to conform, it can be very hard to hear your own fashion voice–especially if it’s become unrecognizable.
Style identity starts to feel like that one person in a group conversation who keeps trying to speak, but keeps getting talked over. Nobody is paying attention. Nobody is listening.
The noise is too loud.
So… what is the “noise”?
It’s everything that drowns authenticity. Let’s break it down:
Fast Fashion.
It feeds into fast trends, pumping out new styles at lightning speed—often without regard for originality or crediting the smaller designers it copies from.
And if you don’t buy a trending piece fast enough, it already feels ran through by the time it lands on your doorstep. A dozen GRWM videos later… and you haven’t even taken the tag off.
Aesthetics that try to box us in.
It’s quiet luxury on one end, streetwear on the other, and extreme pressure to choose a side as if fashion wasn’t meant to be explored.
Fashion wasn’t meant to box us in. It’s meant to set us free.
It’s multidimensional. And style is fluid.
Together, they reflect who you are–not who you’re trying to be just to fit in or stay relevant.
Being overly influenced by influencers.
Let’s be real: we all get style inspo from somewhere. But there’s a difference being inspired and simply copying & pasting someone else’s style.
If it feels like everyone’s dressing the same, it’s because, well… they kind of are. Brands churn out the same garments. Influencers (not all, but many) recycle those same looks in different colors–if that.
That’s why influence should be the outline, not the final draft.
Your personal style starts with you, not your For You page.
Fashion is multidimensional. Style is fluid.
Let me be clear: I’m not anti-trend.
If you like it, wear it.
Just make sure you’re truly wearing it for you, not because you feel pressured for social approval.
Ask yourself:
Would I wear this if no one saw it?
Would I still love it if it didn’t get compliments or likes?
The issue isn’t the trend.
It’s the absence of you in it.
So, put your spin on it. Add a little razzle dazzle.
Why blend in when you can sparkle and shine?
Discovering Your Fashion Dialect
Have you ever looked in the mirror and thought, “This isn’t me”?
Same.
Maybe the outfit never reflected you.
Or maybe you’ve simply outgrown it.
Either way, this isn’t a crisis.
It’s an epiphany. A reset.
A sign you’re entering your next style era.
Just like your voice, your style evolves over time.
It transforms through every season of growth, visually communicating who you are before you even say a word.
We all speak differently, with unique accents and inflections.
Some of that is shaped by where we’re from. But most of it is who we are.
And the same is true for how we dress.
Your fashion dialect is your personal style language.
It’s not defined by trends, seasons, or what’s considered “acceptable” by the masses.
It’s defined by what makes you feel like you.
It’s the way you stack jewelry or mix metals.
The way you add a pop of color to a neutral fit.
The way you style the outfit–not let the outfit style you.
It’s the pieces you gravitate toward, like love at first sight.
The ones that stop you mid-scroll, make you pause mid-stride, or say, “I need that” the second you see them. They make you feel like HER.
And this will shift as you shift.
As you age, evolve, heal, and rebuild—again, again, and again.
So, no, you don’t have to put yourself in a box and stick to one “aesthetic” forever.
But do pay attention to the patterns.
They’re clues.
And they’ll guide you toward the style that feels most aligned with your growth and essence.
Let’s Have Some Fun!
Use Canva or Pinterest to create a mini moodboard with 5 outfits that make you feel like that girl.
Now ask yourself:
1. What do they have in common? (Color palette? Silhouette? Texture or fabric?)
2. Were you dressed up or dressed down?
3. Was it for a special occasion or a regular day?
These answers will help you decode your fashion dialect. Because at the end of the day, your style doesn’t need to fit a trend, nor does it have to look a certain way.
It just has to resonate with you.
Fashion is more than just fabric.
And style is not one-size-fits-all.
It’s individuality.
It’s art.
When you understand your style language, you reclaim your power and take ownership of who you are. You style with intention. Move with authenticity. And release yourself from the shackles of insecurity and the need for acceptance.
When you do this, people notice.
Because you’re unique. You’re distinct.
You’re all that AND a bag of chips.
So, I’d never say don’t dress to impress.
Just make sure you impress the most important person in the room: you.
There’s only an “I” in identity.
And she deserves to take up space.
Style the Life You Want
Style isn’t just about what you wear.
It’s about how boldly you show up in it.
Every outfit gives off a certain energy, whether that be modest and polished, cool and laid back, or sexy and provocative.
Your outfit speaks before you do.
So, when you get dressed, ask yourself:
1. Does this reflect who I am or am becoming?
2. How does she carry herself?
3. What energy is my outfit giving?
If it’s not giving, take it off and try again.
There’s power in dressing with intention.
It evokes a different kind of confidence, one rooted in self-recognition and security.
One that doesn’t seek approval. It’s all about pleasing yourself.
Because fashion isn’t just about expression.
It’s affirmation.
It’s embodiment.
Let’s Make it Visual
If you’re a visual girly, create a mood board that reflects the woman you’re becoming or have always dreamed of being. Not just her outfits, but her world. Her vibe. Her lifestyle.
As you build your board, sprinkle in these affirmations:
Let’s Do Some Visualization
If you prefer to journal, respond to this prompt:
It’s the first day of spring in March 2035. You’re living your dream life.
From the moment you wake up to the moment you fall asleep, describe your day in vivid detail. What’s your plans for the day? What are you wearing? Does it match the energy of the life you’ve created? Does it align with the woman you’ve become?
That version of you? You don’t have to wait until 2035 to become her.
Show up as her now.
Babe, You’re Already Her.
There’s no deadline on becoming the woman of your dreams, only a start date. And guess what? The start date is today.
Because when you dress like her,
you start to walk like her.
And when you walk like her,
you become her.
That’s the power of personal style. It’s not just about how you look. It’s about how you feel in what you wear, and how that feeling helps you rise to your fullest potential.
Your style is a mirror of your mindset. A reflection of your personality. Every outfit is an opportunity to show the world the woman you are, the one you’re becoming, and the one who’s been in you all along.
So as you decode your true fashion language and step into your next style era, carry this with you:
- Real style doesn’t follow—it leads.
- Style is individuality. It’s expression. It’s art.
- You’re not a copy, babe. You’re not a sequel or a 2.0.
You’re a story. A statement. A WHOLE mood.
Your style says something.
So make sure what it’s saying is:
I Am Her.
About the Writer
Arielle Louise is the founder of The Avantage, exploring fashion, lifestyle, and culture through impactful stories.
With love and soul, she empowers women to dress in style, lead with confidence, and unapologetically take up space.
Stay tuned for more to help you dress well, live well, and lead boldly,
only on The Avantage.
xo,
The Avantage 